


With Friends Like These

by setos_puppy



Category: Kick-Ass (2010)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Characters Reading Fanfiction, Hand Jobs, M/M, Originally Posted on LiveJournal, Posted in 2010
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-20
Packaged: 2019-08-26 07:57:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16677661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/setos_puppy/pseuds/setos_puppy
Summary: Dave gives Chris an out. Chris takes it.





	With Friends Like These

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally inspired by a link to an alternat ending in the second draft of the script that I found on the Kick Ass kink meme that is, unfortunately, no longer available. It changed the ending to be much more sympathetic toward Red Mist with him being talked down from the edge. 
> 
> Furthermore, Dave never told Katie he wasn't gay, but she does know he's Kick Ass.

_”How do you know my name?!”_

_Dave looked between the annoyed face of Hit Girl towards Chris, who was still pleading for his life. The police were nearly there, their sirens getting closer and closer. Dave hesitated, looking to the unmasked face of the boy who had been pushed too far by his father - who had just wanted to fit in - who was pleading for his life. Sighing, Dave pulled the cowl off his face, the bloodstained ‘mask’ clenched in his hand._

_“Dave? Dave Lizewski?”_

_Before Dave could even respond there was the sound of the elevator dinging open and he yanked the cowl back over his face, ignoring the burst of pain that exploded from his likely broken nose. He crowded against Chris, shoving a Red Mist mask that he had found in the wreckage on the floor into his hands. Chris looked to it and then to Dave before nodding and slipping the mask in place over his eyes._

_“T-thanks.”_

_Dave lifted a shoulder in a shrug, words useless, and lifted his hands in the air as the police rounded the corner and shouted at them to freeze._

 

They had, surprisingly, made it through the interrogation without much trouble. Dave figured it was thanks to Marcus pulling strings. Chris - who Marcus now knew was Red Mist - was cleared, along with Chris’ mother, and was let out of the back of the station through a side door with Dave. 

 

They had stared at one another. Apology in both of their eyes before Dave pulled on Chris’ wrist and started leading him back to his place. 

 

“Hey man...” Chris’ voice was soft as they headed down Dave’s street. “You don’t have to do this for me. My dad made me be a total ass...”

 

“Exactly, your _dad_ made you. Are you him?” Dave stopped and turned on his heel, turning to look at Chris. Chris looked back, startled, before shaking his head. “Good, now shut up and c’mon.”

 

They slipped into the background unnoticed and Dave climbed up the lattice work to avoid getting spotted by his father. He sat on the roof over the porch and hauled Chris up, before making his way over to his window and pushed it up before climbing in, followed seconds later by Chris.

 

“Dave! Oh thank God!”

 

Dave whirled, startled by the voice and nearly landed on his ass. Katie was standing at the foot of his bed looking frantic. He smiled at her and wrapped his arms around her, she arched up on her toes, her arms wrapped around his neck as she removed the cowl and assessed the damage to his face. 

 

“I told you that it was too dangerous.” She scolded, wagging her index finger in his face. “How many gay superheroes do you know of that survive?”

 

“Northstar.” Chris’ voice was a cut through the silence between them and Katie’s head popped around Dave’s shoulder. Chris offered a half-smile and a wave him her direction. “Northstar’s still going strong. He’s a gay superhero. Also, dude, she knows your real identity?”

 

Dave turned halfway and rose a shoulder in a shrug. “I needed to tell someone and Katie’s good at keeping secrets. She’s like...” Dave paused a moment, struggling with the idea. “She’s like Lois Lane or Mary Jane. Also, dude, Anole and Graymalkin are way cooler and gayer than Northstar.”

 

“She said _superheroes_ not students. If you go that route why don’t you just pick Wiccan and Hulkling. And you just said Anole and Graymalkin because you want them to get together. Also, how can she be Mary Jane or Mrs. Lane-Kent if you’re gay and don’t plan on getting into her pants?”

 

“That isn’t the point! I was answering her question about there being living gay, awesome superheroes. And hey, Mary Jane was friends with Peter way before she fell in love with him, and I just meant that she knew my secret identity like they knew.”

 

“Then use Alfred. He knows Bruce Wayne is Batman!”

 

Dave opened his mouth to retort before Katie stepped between the two of them, her arms outstretched. “Okay boys. I think you made your point. Yes, there are gay superheroes. I was wrong. I’m sorry. Secondly, yes, I know Dave is Kick Ass, and, if you feel comfortable telling me who you are, Red Mist, I’ll keep that secret too.” 

 

Chris hesitated, looking over to Dave who rose his shoulders in a shrug. Chris nodded a little and reached up to remove the mask about his eyes, revealing his face to her. 

 

“Holy _shit_ , Chris D’Amico!” She whirled on Dave, her eyes wide. “Chris is Red Mist?” She turned back to Chris. “Sorry.. Just... I mean, I’ve seen you at Atomic Comics and with all those body guards and stuff...” She smoothed her hands down her front and cleared her throat. “Hi.”

 

“Uh, yeah... hi.” Chris rose a brow at her and then looked past her to Dave. “Can I use your shower?”

 

“Yeah.” Dave walked over to his drawers and pulled out a pair of old gym shorts and a t-shirt before handing them over to Chris. “Bathroom is right across the hall.”

 

Chris nodded his head and swooped out of the bedroom with all the drama that came with wearing a cape. Dave sighed as the door closed and started undressing, hissing in pain as he peeled the wetsuit off his shoulders, which were heavily bruised purple. He hadn’t even realized how bruised he was; had barely felt it, what with is fucked up nerves and all. Now he was feeling it.

 

“I can’t believe that Chris is Red Mist. That really changes those stories I’ve been reading.”

 

“Yeah, he’s had a bit of a rough night so - stories?” Dave looked to Katie in the mirror and she smiled at him. 

 

“Yeah, these stories about Kick Ass and Red Mist. They’re all over the internet. Have been since you started hanging out together.”

 

Dave cocked a brow and leaned heavily on his dresser as he stepped out of the bloody wet suit and then into a pair of worn sweatpants. “There’s fanfiction of us? That’s...” He smiled. It hurt his face. “Kind of awesome.”

 

“So...” Katie ventured, approaching Dave as he pulled on his t-shirt and then his glasses. She laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Is he really not your type, or were you lying before?”

 

Dave huffed a laugh. He doesn’t even know what he is anymore. Gay or straight or maybe something in between. “He’s pretty awesome. He’s got a great knowledge of comics and...” Dave trailed off, sitting on his bed. “His dad is dead, his dad was a bad guy.”

 

“What?” Katie crossed from the dresser to the bed and sits next to Dave. “Oh God, was he the one...”

 

“The video? Yeah. Well... his men anyway.” Dave doesn’t want to get into how Chris had been involved. It hadn’t been Chris’ fault the way he saw it. Chris had been pushed to the point he would have done anything for his father. Dave knew the stories about Frank D’Amico. Everyone did. 

 

“And... Chris?”

 

“Chris is my partner. I trust him.”

 

Katie nodded and they looked up in unison as Chris pushed the door open, walking in with his costume in a heap, bundled up in his arms. His cheek is sporting a pretty awesome bruise that was dark in colour. His face is cleaned of blood and the thick liner around his eyes. The high spiked wig left in his hands to show dripping hair. He looks so different - so much younger - frailer; practically drowning in Dave’s varsity shirt. 

 

“Hey, do you want a drink?” Katie asked, getting up and heading to the door. It was directed at both boys and they both nodded. 

 

Chris set his mask on Dave’s dresser next to the blood soaked cowl and stood there a long moment, staring down at it. “You didn’t need to do this for me.”

 

“You’re my friend. My partner. Of course I did.”

 

Chris smiled a faint smile and crossed to the computer desk, wheeling the chair over to beside the bed and sat down in it. “Are you really gay? I mean, I heard rumours at school, but...”

 

Dave shrugged, trying to play it casual. “You know... I dunno... Maybe? I guess?”

 

Chris nodded his head. “That’s cool. I don’t want you thinking I’m judging. I’m not. It’s just nice to you know...”

 

Dave looked up from his crossed legs over to Chris, who was looking around the room, everywhere but at Dave. “Nice to what?”

 

“Know that there’s someone else out there like me.”

 

Dave nodded his head, somber. He wasn’t exactly sure what to say to that. What were you supposed to say to someone who was your friend; your partner in crime-fighting; your fellow comic book nerd; who you may or may not have been crushing on when they tell you they play for your team? 

 

“Oh... Hey...” Dave ventured, finally breaking the silence, making Chris look up. “Katie says they write fanfiction about us. Kick Ass and Red Mist, I mean.”

 

Before Chris could answer, Katie opened the door, three cans of Pepsi in her arms, a box of cookies in one hand and a plate balanced high with peanut butter and jam sandwiches in the other. Dave smiled, taking the plate and pulling a sandwich out of the pile before biting into it and offering the plate to Chris. 

 

They ate in silence, the TV playing in the background, Katie sprawled out on her stomach on the bed beside Dave flicking absently through the channels while picking the crust off her sandwich and eating it first. Dave spent at good portion of his eating time looking at Chris and then looking away before deciding to just stare at his carpet and eat. They finished their sandwiches and moved onto the cookies. Katie talked about work and every so often Dave interrupted with questions or Chris nodded to indicate he was listening. 

 

“Anyway, I need to get going. I have to finish my Chemistry homework before bed.” Katie stood and Dave followed her to the window. She wrapped her arms around his neck again, pulling his ear to her mouth and lowering her voice to a soft whisper. “He likes you. He’s been watching you. Go for it.” She stepped down and back before pressing a kiss to his cheek and peering around his shoulder to wave to Chris. “See you at school tomorrow?”

 

“I’ll be there.”

 

“Great.” With one last smile to Dave, Katie climbed out the window and shimmied down the lattice work. Dave watched as she waved up at him before climbing over his back fence.

 

“She seems nice.”

 

Dave nodded, turning around after closing the window and latching it. “So... What now?”

 

Chris shrugged and spun in the chair, bored. “There’s fanfiction of us, really?”

 

“That’s what she said, I’ve never read any.” 

 

Chris stopped in his spinning in the chair and peered towards Dave’s laptop with a grin. “Want to look for some?”

 

Dave sputtered, but Chris was already wheeled over to the desk and clicking open the browser. Dave grabbed his spare rickety computer chair and moved it next to Chris’ as Chris opened up google and did a basic search. Chris scanned a few of the pages, before actually finding a story. They exchanged glances and nervous half-smiles before beginning to read. 

 

It wasn’t all that bad; a lot of flowery language, giving way the fact the author was a girl. It wasn’t really anything special. Just them in the Mistmobile talking about the latest bad guy they took down. Nothing overly sexual; nothing remotely sexual, actually. Chris clicked on the little red X and the scrolled through the web pages. 

 

“Wait, go back...” Dave breathed after Chris had scrolled past a story. Dave pointed to the small little descriptive box. _Red Mist/Kick Ass; they decide to ‘christen’ their lair *g**g**g*; R_. “Lair? What do they think we are, Batman and Robin?”

 

“I guess so.” Chris muttered, clicking on the link. 

 

They both sat back, scanning through the first few paragraphs. Most of it was set up - descriptors of their lair - which Dave was starting to think sounded like a pretty good idea. The author had made it sound awesome; a mixture of dark red with black highlights for walls and green furniture. Somehow it didn’t sound like Christmas had exploded everywhere.

 

_”Red Mist!”_

_The dark haired, mysterious, crimson clad male turned from his retreat, his cape swishing as he moved. “Yes, Kick Ass?”_

_“I...” Kick Ass stammered, his heart was thudding in his chest as he tried to find the right words._

_“I know.” Red Mist said suddenly, closing the gap between them within moments. His gloved hand brushed over the material of Kick Ass’ mask as he leaned down and kissed him._

_Kick Ass gasped into the kiss, unable to believe this was finally happening. He had waited for so long! He let his eyes slide shut as he melted into Red Mist’s strong, manly embrace and let his mouth be plundered._

 

Chris was bent over the desk howling with laughter and Dave was half-way between uncomfortable and maybe a little aroused. 

 

“Dude, what the fuck was that? Is that what people think we do in our spare time? Plus, who wrote this, a harlequin romance novelist?”

 

“C’mon, man.” Dave tried to reason. “They don’t know we’re just regular guys!”

 

Chris managed to compose himself as he closed the window and then opened another. “Okay, let’s try this one.”

 

After a good, solid fifteen minutes of reading the stories was starting to seem like a waste of time. They all seemed like they were written by a fourteen year old who giggled at the word “cock”. If they weren’t overly flowery or cheesy, they had no idea of how the male anatomy worked and thought that you could just stick something in there without preparation. A revelation that both Chris and Dave cringed at in fear and horror.

 

Chris was frowning at the screen, scrolling through pages that matched Red Mist with Iceman from X-Men, desperately looking for something _decent_ to read. “I thought you said Katie had found good ones.”

 

“Maybe they’re on a site we haven’t seen. Hang on, let me message her.” 

 

Dave clicked on the little chat icon on screen and scrolled through a list of names before stopping on Katie’s and clicking it open. 

 

Welcome to Mutant High says:  
you said there was a bunch of stories of Kick Ass and Red Mist?? we’ve been looking. where are the good ones?

Katie Banana says:   
omg, youre acutally reading them? lol lol hang on, i read a really good one a little bit ago. newly posted. 

Welcome to Mutant High says:  
they’re so bad some of them, we just keep laughing. im waiting *taps foot impatiently*

Katie Banana says:  
hold ur horses, bitch. 

Welcome to Mutant High says:  
don’t call me a bitch, bitch

Katie Banana says:  
here, now i gotta go, moms giving me hell. ttfn.

Katie Banana is offline.

 

Dave smiled victoriously and clicked the link as he took a long drink of his Pepsi and leaned over as Chris scrolled down on the page. “What’s it about.”

 

“The summary was just a few words: Red Mist. Kick Ass. Mistmobile.”

 

Dave made a curious noise and leaned close to Chris to read off the small screen. 

 

_The back seat of the Mistmobile isn’t as big as they previously thought, but there’s just enough wiggle room to let them get close together. They’re clinging to each other with a quiet desperation and need to affirm the other was there; was alive._

_“I thought I’d lost you...” Red Mist’s voice was rushed as his hands smoothed over Kick Ass’ shoulders._

_They had almost been caught by a bunch of bank robbers, they had gotten separated and Red Mist had gone back for his partner. Finding Kick Ass in the middle of a bunch of gun toting baddies on the ground getting the shit kicked out of him had been a moment he wanted to forget even though he knew he’d always remember it._

_“I’m here, it’s alright.” Kick Ass’ voice was clipped, trying to be reassuring through the pain; trying to let Red Mist know he was still loved._

_When they kissed it was filled with desperation and longing. They moved slowly over the black leather seats of the car until Red Mist was sprawled out, his back and shoulder shoved against the hard plastic frame of the door. When they parted, Kick Ass drew Red Mist’s hands to his mouth, pressing a kiss against the leather clad palms before slowly removing the gloves and tossing them somewhere on the floor. Moments later his own gloves joined them._

_Their hands clasped; flesh on flesh, as they brought their mouths together again. They parted again and Red Mist’s face was damp with tears, Kick Ass kissed them away. Kick Ass unzipped the front of Red Mist’s costume and pressed his mouth to the exposed pale, smooth flesh. Slowly, he worked his way down his lover’s torso, making a frustrated noise as he struggled with the clasp on Red Mist’s God forsaken pants._

_Once he had managed to expose as much delectable skin as he sought, Kick Ass let himself be drawn back into his lover’s arms. When they kissed, Kick Ass let Red Mist’s tongue flick against his lip before their tongues slid together. Red Mist unzipped the back zipper to Kick Ass’ costume, and with help, not breaking their kiss, he managed to push the seafoam green one piece down, hands greedily seeking for purchase over bruised flesh._

_Their kiss broke, their lips swollen and reddened, shining with their mixed saliva. They paused a moment, hands reminding themselves of sweet spots over flesh, moving over scars and pressing kisses to new cuts and bruises._

_They never removed their masks; it was the one barrier between them; the one line they never crossed._

_Kick Ass smiled, lips pressing to Red Mist’s collarbone as he slid their needy bodies together. Red Mist tossed his head back, knees parting as his hips rocked up against Kick Ass’, he gave a soft, breathy gasp as his body shuddered, a quiet curse leaving his mouth. Their hips undulated, moving slowly at first, trying to make it last, before desperation took over and their tempo increased._

_Kick Ass groaned, throwing his head back as his cock slid alongside Red Mist’s in the perfect amount of friction. “Jesusfuck.”_

_Red Mist laughed throatily, the sound morphing into a moan at a particularly hard shove of Kick Ass’ hips and a bite on his collar bone. “ _Ughn_ , do that again.” _

_Their hips rolled and rocked together fervently as they got closer and closer to climax. Words dissolved into grunts and gasps of pleasure; the air was thick with the scent of a sex and the lengthy silences were filled with ragged panting._

_Red Mist stiffened suddenly, throwing his head back with a grunt as his hips pushed up and his legs kicked against the leather seats as he came between their bodies. A few hard pushes of his hips later, Kick Ass shuddered and jerked above Red Mist before sliding bonelessly against his lover._

_They shared a languid kiss as they lay in each other’s arms, enjoying the silence._

 

Dave swallowed thickly as he sat back in his chair, which startled him out of his reverie further when it shuddered and gave a creak of plastic against plastic. He looked over to Chris, who was still staring at the screen with pink tinged cheeks and parted lips. In a way, he almost look debauched; so undone and, Dave guessed, worked up. 

 

It was odd. The story wasn’t overly descriptive, but it had made it hard enough for Dave to focus with Chris’ wheezy breaths next to his face. He wasn’t sure what had gotten him so hot; the story, Chris, or a combination of both. It was weird; reading porn about your superhero alter ego and partner-slash-up-and-coming-best-friend with him _right there_ and both of you having acknowledged that you liked dick in some way or another. 

 

Dave wondered if this was what couples who watched porn together felt like.

 

He did _not_ just equate himself and Chris to a couple. Nope. Not at all. 

 

“Dude...” Dave started slowly, unsure of what to do, exactly. “Do you want me to give you the room... or something?”

 

Which - okay - fucked up kind of question because what would he be thinking about if he was whacking off? It certainly wasn’t going to be Iceman or Pyro; or even Brad-stereotypical-Pitt. It was going to be them. In that car. Together. 

 

“I’m cool.” Chris replied after several long beats. His voice was husky and rougher than Dave was used to. 

 

Dave nodded and stared at his knees for a long moment before looking back over to Chris. He was leaning back in the chair, still gazing blankly at the screen. Dave’s eyes raked over Chris’ body. His eyes wandered over his shoulders, which were almost exposed in Dave’s t-shirt, and to his pale legs barely covered in a pair of gym shorts. Before Dave realized what he was doing, he was craning his neck forward, his eyes drifting to the prominent bulge in the shorts he had let Chris borrow. 

 

 _Jesus_.

 

Dave scooted his chair closer and Chris looked over, bemused and curious, before the darker haired male turned his chair sideways to look at Dave. He had a crooked smile on his face, one Dave found himself quickly returning. Chris leaned over, his hands sliding over the armrests on Dave’s chair before their mouths finally met. 

 

Dave groaned faintly, a hand sliding up into Chris’ hair to clutch as he arched his back up and away from the chair. It wasn’t what he imagined it to be like. He imagined it hard and bruising, like he had spent nights awake, staring at the ceiling, thinking about. He imagined Chris would taste like Red Hots, not blood and peanut butter. Chris pressed down against him, a slim hand sliding over his neck, pressing almost painfully against a bruise, and opened his mouth. 

 

Dave pressed at Chris’ shoulders and forced the smaller male back. Their lips broke and Chris ducked his head, going in for a second, as Dave stood and smiled, he tilted his head back as Dave ducked his head slightly and matched their mouths. They backed up towards the messily made rectangle in the middle of the room, Chris fell back on it, breaking the kiss with a bubbling laugh that Dave couldn’t help but imitate as he climbed onto the bed as Chris scooted back against the pillows. 

 

Dave couldn’t help but wonder, as he was drawn into a second, scorching kiss, how they ended up here. He knew, of course, that they had been dancing around one another slowly; like a sadistic mating ritual that only nerds did. But really, Dave could have sworn he was straight before all this shit went down and he was sitting next to Red Mist in the Mistmobile while dancing to Gnarls Barkley. 

 

Maybe it was always meant to be this way.

 

Dave groaned as Chris bit at his neck, licking up to his ear in a way that would have been surprisingly awkward if it wasn’t so goddamn hot. 

 

Maybe it didn’t matter. 

 

Dave’s shirt was thrown off first and he sat back on his knees while Chris pushed himself up on his elbows and skimmed his fingers round every bruise before flicking his tongue over the mottled, technicolour skin, in a way that made Dave crazy. Chris’ shirt was tossed off in a heap, chucked over Dave’s shoulder without a backwards glance even after it knocked something onto the floor with a clatter. 

 

“What exactly are we doing here?” Dave murmured between kisses, righting his glasses on his nose again. 

 

“I thought you were pretty clear on the concept.”

 

“No, I am... I just... I’ve never...”

 

Chris stopped the inane chatter by pressing his fingers to Dave’s lips, replacing them moments later with a teasing press of his mouth curved into that infuriating and arousing smirk of his. “Relax, what kind of a boy do you think I am, letting you go all the way our first night.”

 

Chris made a tutting noise in the back of his throat that made Dave want to smack him, but it was reassuring in a way Dave couldn’t quite convey. Instead, Dave settled for bowing his head down and sucking a bruise into Chris’ neck and listening to the delightful, nasally whines Chris made as he greedily shoved his hips into Dave’s. 

 

Dave felt dizzy, his body going into hyperdrive as he guided one of Chris’ legs over his hip and pressed his hips against the lithe male’s body. Chris’ head rolled back on the pillow as he gibbered nonsense and his hands raked down Dave’s shoulders and back in a way that bordered on painful. Dave just kept up the erratic thrusts of his hips, his forehead resting against Chris’ as Chris’ heel dug into the small of his back and his leg tightened and Chris twitched his hips to the right _just so_.

 

Chris groaned and breathed out Dave’s name as he wormed his hand past the drawstring waistband of Dave’s pants and wrapped his slender fingers around Dave’s heavy, hot cock and stroked. Dave hissed through clenched teeth and his hips rocked harder and harder as he mouthed down Chris’ jaw with sloppy, wet kisses. Chris opened his mouth to make a smart ass retort about returning the favour when he felt Dave’s hand slide into his borrowed shorts and felt Dave’s broader, calloused hand around his cock, pulling in uneven jerks. 

 

Chris wrapped his free hand in the mess of Dave’s curls and pulled him down to his mouth, whimpering into the frantic kiss as they both worked to bring each other off. The smaller male turned his head to the side, his free hand sliding from Dave’s hair to his shoulder to clench in warning. Heat was pooling in his stomach and his thighs were starting to shake. 

 

“I’m gonna...” Chris stammered out, his breathing shallow and desperate. “I’m gonna _come_.” Chris’ back arched as his world whited out behind his eyes and for a moment he was pretty sure he saw the face of God - and said Face of God looked like Yoda riding a unicorn. 

 

“Fuck, fuck, _shit_.” Dave swore before he sunk his teeth into the pale flesh of Chris’ neck as he came over Chris’ hand and into his sweatpants before oozing bonelessly onto his bed beside Chris. 

 

Chris’ eyes fluttered and he turned his head to the side, smiling at the sight of Dave, still slightly twitching, face down on a pillow. “That was awesome. Do you have kleenex?”

 

“Top drawer.” Dave said into the pillow. He heard Chris root around in the drawer before it banged shut and the box of tissues was thrown at his head moments later. Dave groaned and rolled over, feeling like the movement took all the effort in the world. “That was all kinds of awesome.”

 

There was a moment, after wiping his hands clean and throwing the wadded up tissues in the trash, that Dave wondered what this made them - him. But it melted away when Chris pressed their lips together and murmured something about a Kill Bill double feature. 

\--

The next morning was surprisingly uneventful. Dave’s dad was still out of town on work so they showered and Dave gave Chris some more clothes. They ate a nutritious breakfast of pop tarts and sprite before heading off to school, Chris standing on the back of Dave’s bike while Dave peddled down the street. 

 

It was surprisingly not awkward. 

 

And it stayed surprisingly not awkward until lunch.

 

With Katie. 

 

And Marty and Todd. 

 

It was unseasonably warm and sunny so Dave had suggested they consume their school regulation food-like products outside. He and Chris had set up under a tree, talking about what they were going to do about Kick Ass and Red Mist, when Katie ran over, all waves and smiles. 

 

“Hey! How’re you guys?”

 

“Good.” Chris greeted shortly, poking at something calling itself meatloaf on his tray. “I think this is made from saw dust.”

 

“Oh... my God...” Katie said after taking a bite of her egg salad sandwich. “You two had sex.”

 

“What?!” Dave screeched, his voice just a shy hint from hysterical. “We did not!”

 

“Well, Mr. Lizewski, you certainly look less homicidal today, which I’m taking to mean you got off.” Katie teased, poking him in the nose with a carrot stick. 

 

“Hey Dave.” Marty greeted, dropping down opposite the three. “What are we talking about?”

 

“Nothing.” Dave shot out at the same time as Katie sing-songed “their love life”. 

 

Marty looked up from his chocolate milk and towards Dave who was frowning and then to Chris. “Oh... You’re dating D’Amico?” There was a pause as he processed this without Todd by his side. “Okay.”

 

“Hey Dave!” Todd shouted as he ran up the slight incline towards the tree. “Did you see the Kick-Ass video last night?”

 

Dave hedged before making a non-committal noise and taking a bite of his apple, murmuring something around his mouthful that could have been taken as a comment about anything.

 

“I know man, I was crazy. Hey, why is D’Amico here. I mean... Hi, I’m Todd.”

 

Chris shook Todd’s hand as he glanced up from his copy of The Hunger Games. “Nice to meet you.”

 

“Apparently he and Dave are dating.”

 

“We’re not dating!”

 

“Are you dating him, Dave?”

 

Dave huffed a sigh, shaking his head wordlessly. “It... We...”

 

“I’m the Robin to his Batman.” Chris interrupted, leaning over a patch of grass to pick up one of Katie’s carrot sticks. “The Pyro to his Iceman. The...” He crunched down on the carrot stick. “The Red Mist to his Kick Ass.”

 

Dave rose a brow and pushed his glasses up his nose, looking down at the almost too innocent looking Chris, who shifted and lay flat on his stomach as he crammed the rest of his stolen carrot stick into his mouth. Dave cupped Chris’ chin as he swallowed and pressed their mouths together in a chaste kiss. 

 

“Pay up.” 

 

Dave looked over and saw Marty stick his hand out under Todd’s nose. Todd made a face and pulled his wallet out, slapping a bill into Marty’s hand. 

 

“So...” Todd ventured after taking a bite of his limp salad. “I was rewatching Donnie Darko last night and...”

 

“Here we go again...” Dave muttered, shifting to lie on his back, his head pillowed on Chris’ bony shoulder, his crossed ankles resting against the trunk of the tree. 

 

“There _has_ to be a reason behind why Donnie’s sister is voting for Dukakis.”

 

Dave closed his eyes as a breeze swept over them and tossed the leaves as he listened to Todd’s bullshit theory. 

 

It was surprisingly not awkward.


End file.
